Hii everyone

Today I'm starting new series on my blog called "Life Chats" where basically I'll be talking ( well writing) anything about everything that comes to my mind and it can't be fitted in any categories of this blog, so if you have any topics you would like to hear my opinion about let me know in comments or just tweet me. here



I wanted to kick things off with one very important thing in my life that happened recently and that's passing my driving test. To many people that isn't such a big big deal like is to me but also a lot of those people don't suffer from anxiety.

Expectations 

Before signing in driving school I was very scared and nervous about it, so much so that I postponed it for 2 full months because I couldn't come over fear that I had that I'll hit someone or something with car and the fact that I'll be in control of moving car that could hurt not only me but other people also I was hit by a car when I was 7 so somewhere in my subconscious I did leave a mark. And well the fact I can't see on my right eye was huge impact too ( will write about it another time)

After I force myself into school and started listening theory  things got just a bit easier and I started to feel a bit more relaxed about whole thing, and here comes that BUT.. I have failed my theory exam for first and then second time..

Experience 

My first test was big hit and miss thing as I was so nervous and anxious about fact that I'm one step closer to driving and that there are so many rules and laws to follow and that I'm not able to remember them all. To be completely honest I wasn't expecting to pass, which you can't tell for second test where I was sure that I'm done. I was so much more confident and ready that I finished my exam in 20 minutes. Big mistake. 3th time charm, best one in class and just days apart from coming face to face with my fear.

Driving lessons now that I look back where so much more casual in beginning  then in end, I was probably more scared of fact that I'm coming to end and I got job in minetime so I was a lot more tired. I have then once again failed at my test simple because I was rushing nothing else, and next time well let just say instructor told me I'm one of the best he had in past few months if not year or two.

Anxiety and driving now

I've been driving for past month which seems so long ago since I drive every single day. My anxiety has let's say gone in big portion form day I sign in but it's still here, everytime I sit in car and start engine, but it did got easier not by much but it did. I'm still very sacred to drive on very busy roads and starting car on hill and parking, my car still sometimes go off in middle of traffic lights and I'm refusing to pass another car no matter how slow he is.  Would anxiety be here forever?! I have no idea I know I would love it to pass but than again I can't quite control this condition.


They say "time heels"  and I would love to report back in year or two to see just how far I come, who knows but for now I'm staying positive and happy that I manage to overcome such a big fear of mine.